The ugly truth
I like to be strong, organized, in control, positive, happy, rested, ambitious – and I’d like this blog to reflect my personality of that, of the good times, the happy times, the “this is the greatest time of my life” type of blog – and I wasn’t going to post this, but then I figured – you know what.. having triplets isn’t rosy, it isn’t fun, it’s hard to be positive and it’s down right impossible to feel rested and egar for the next day to begin. And if I didn’t capture this – I would be lying. I wouldn’t be sharing the whole story with my readers – and my children – who I hope to print this entire blog off one day – make a book for them and give it to them. Perhaps the boys will think I’m slightly insane and want little to do with it – but maybe the girls will find some interest in their mothers madness 😛
Have you been diagnoised with clinical depression? That was about the 5th phrase out of the public health nurses mouth when she visited yesterday as I broke down crying. No – not yet lol. But really what singleton mother doesn’t feel slightly overwhelmed at the begining – I think it’s only normal that I’m in a slight stage of depression – I have THREE. I’m not totally depressed just feeling like this is impossible.
I’ve also started to realize why couples of multiples have a MUCH higher divorce rate than the average public. I was almost part of that statistic two nights ago. Men just dont get it. If you were to have multiples I would seek out a same sex couple, or a VERY metrosexual male. Because a real man just can’t put it together, and with my sleep deprevation I snapped on Keith the other day. I slammed him for only taking THREE days off once our triplets were born – really who does that? I cursed him for not wanting to spend any of the nights with me in the hospital. I regreated having to do IVF , because of “his” problem..thus resulting in triplets that I seem to be soley caring for…I was angry at him calling me a “quitter” for thinking I cannot breast feed any longer ( which I’m still trying)…. AND what set it all off was I was exhausted completly down right exhausted and said “ok Im going to sleep from 8-11 totally uninterrupted please”…. What did he do? 10pm brought all the babies up to my room and left to go work out – WTF???????? And of course they all work up at like 1030 and I had to get up and feed them all – 2.5hrs of sleep wasnt’ what I was intending. ANYWAYS we’ve resolved most of this and the public health nurse is pretty much going to tell him to get his act together or else ….so that’ll help – he’s also agreed I think (?!) to take next month off of work to help me. I can’t do 3 babies alone. He wants to help, and he’s such a family man, and he means well – he just doesn’t always get it.
I’m also feeling a little like I got the short end of the stick. These are likely are last babies and it’s like Im not able to fully enjoy it – which pisses me off.
But the flip end of the stick there are a TON of great things I can’t wait for with these babies, and I love them all so much. The funnest thing about being a parent of multiples I find now is that each baby really honestly – from birth – has their own personality. It’s hard to believe when you have one, but with 3 my gosh do you see it. We have a walker ( Ben, he always wants to be walked to calm him down) we have a sucker ( Lauren, she sucks ANYTHING she can get into her mouth) and we have a mute lol… We all joke and say she’s our favourite – Alanna. This girl is something, sometimes I wonder if she’s normal or not – I’ve never heard her cry, you can stick her anywhere, she always waits her turn – it’s incredible, too bad we didn’t have 3 of her lol!! But really they are all so great. They even had prefrences of being held. Ben likes to be held tummy to tummy, Lauren like to be craddled and see whats going on otherwise she’ll scream and Alanna – well you guessed it – she just doesn’t care. I’m working really hard right now on ensuring each baby gets some amount of “cuddle” time each day – which is tough!
Bradley is an amazing big brother, we call him “Dr. Boardman” because he’s always assiting with diaper changes, cloth changes etc… He really loves helping. He also will sing to the babies during diaper changes and loves rubbing them, it’s really an amazing thing to see him “in action”. He was supposed to be done montissori school because simply we cannot afford 6 mouthes to feed, AND a massive private tution bill so Friday was supposed to be his last day – however, the principal wants him to continue going ( he’s been there for 3 years already ) and everyone at school loves him, so they are meeting with Keith this week to try and make an arraignment that will be more affordable for us – I am so so so appriciative of that! Also his class bought us nearly 300 diapers – what a nice jesture – the sad part is, when you go through 20 diapers a day – that gets used up VERY quickly 😛 I think tomorrow, now that I can drive, him and I will catch a matinee together – fun 🙂
As for me – I’m super happy all I have left to loose is 25lbs, and it’s only been 2.5 weeks since their birth – so that is not too bad 🙂
Well Im off to prepare for next feeding – it’s what I do best these days…oh and I’ve become the FASTEST diaper changer EVER 🙂
4under4.wordpress.com 
Sounds like a zoo. Your big boy also sounds like the best big brother ever – your DH could take a page out of his book! I hope he shapes up soon and steps in to help you out, or hire help for you if he can’t, because if he thinks that a new father of triplets deserves time out to go to the gym, he’s insane! His time out is going to work during the day. And he’d better not try to tell you that work is exhausting and he needs a break when he gets home! You’re the one who’s running a marathon every day, and you’re the one who needs some relief, and some long long naps when he’s around in the evenings to look after the babies.
Hopefully as they get older and stronger and eat more at each feeding, the feedings will space out a little more and you’ll not be so insanely run off your feet. Can’t believe you’re doing so well on your own so far!
Congrats again on all your wonderful kids.
(And as I was poking around your blog, I saw the C/S fears tab and realized that my comment hadn’t totally scared you. Glad it was helpful – I can be very long-winded when I’m passionate about something!)
Wow!! That is all I can say. It sounds like you are very stressed and I wish there was something I could do to help you out.
1st off – Bradley, WHAT A SWEETHEART! He is an amazing big brother and I am glad he is so helpful, I am sure you need it 🙂
I would have had a major breakdown if my DH only took three days off work, there is no possible way you could do it on your own, you poor girl 😦 I hope the nurse told Keith what he should be doing and I hope he listens, men are just stubborn sometimes.
YAY for only having 25 lbs to loose, I am sure you look amazing!!
*hugs you tight* I am sure it will be better soon, I am thinking of you my friend! *smooches*
ps – hope Brad and the babes have a great halloween.
What a trooper you are, just to find time in your hectic days to keep us in the loop.
I am sure triplets are VERY hard, I had one and was exausted, I feel for you…. wish I could help.
Your DH will come around, I went through pretty much the same thing until one day I lost it, things have been good since, lol.
Bradley is such a darling, what a GREAT big brother!!!
Hope you get some sleep, your babies need mommy to be happy and healthy too.
Hugs to you and your babies!!!
You are a rockstar remember! 😉
Give Keith a slap in the head for me!
XO KL
Oh Bridgey… I feel for you. Men are clueless and hopefully the nurse can get thru the brick walls/head of his.
I wish I could take your kids for two hours just so you could nap. I would you know. You need to rest or you’ll colapse if you keep this up! Duh, like you don’t know that.
If you are bottle feeding/ formula can Keith help with the feedings? And to call you a quitter for that? I’d kill him.
Hang in there…. just remember when they hit the terrible twos you’ll look back at this time and laugh 😉
Bridgeypie, you’re coping to the best of your ability. I like Alanna’s personality though the other babies seem like the ones who will make you realize that the world of babies can be challenging and fun. Hope hubby comes around and that all will be fine.
My friends (parents of triplets) also talk about lack of sleep. as soon as they get time to rest, it’s time for the babies to wake up and be fed an changed again.
(I posted this on the wrong blog entry..this is the right one!)
4 months…this is the magic number! I have twins not triplets, but I am hoping the same holds true for you!
You need sleep to function and although people mean well when they say “sleep when the babies sleep”, moms of multiples know too well that it is rare for all babes to be sleeping at the same time and when they are there is too much to do;) So whenever you can sleep, do it and tell your hubby he better handle things while you are resting;)
Having multiples IS stressful on a relationship. This too will get better in time. I know 4 mths seems like a far way off now, but time will fly and things will fall into place, I promise.
Big hugs. YOU are a great momma!